Old Bitch. New Tricks.

Low fat mayonnaise sucks. Just plain sucks. And yogurt does not taste like sour cream if you put it on a baked potato. There is one kind of light butter that actually tastes like butter, but it has a very…. fluffy … consistency, which turns into a strange liquid if you leave it out of the fridge very long.

So. Lifestyle changes. Mr. GG is doing great after his heart attack. He is going to cardio rehab 3 times a week. He exercises the other days. He is researching all sorts of health related stuff on the internet. He found a site that tells you how many calories it burns to walk to church. Or to kneel in church (not too damn many). Of course we don’t go to church so that was a pretty fruitless bit of info he passed along to me.

We quit smoking cold turkey when Mr. GG’s heart attacked. I am trying to make healthful, low sodium, low fat foods, and I am sick of it. I grew up in the midwest. I make food like people’s grandma’s used to make. I am a whiz cooking with cream, butter, cheese, I can bake about anything, I like sauces. Well, I did make that food. Now I plate up low fat cottage cheese, or black bean and cilantro salad, or vegetables sauteed in chicken broth. Jeez. I need a moment here.

I am sure I will get used to this. Maybe. But when Mr. GG asked me what I was going to do in the way of exercise to go along with our new food regimen, it was hard. I was pretty calm. I suggested he get a skinny new trophy wife, and I could find some old guy to cook for, but no, Mr. GG wants to keep me. He wants me to live a long and healthy life. Too.

Almost losing Mr. GG or else changing a bunch of lifestyle stuff has made me a bit volatile. A little quick on the trigger. And I do miss smoking. I like to smoke cigarettes. But I’d rather have Mr. GG. Getting to the bottom line is a real pain. And it is gonna get worse. Last night we joined a health club. Which required me to buy an industrial strength, mega suppressive, sports bra today. I tell you, some months the hits just keep on coming.

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One Response to “Old Bitch. New Tricks.”

  1. Bobbie Says:

    Also, go with the canola oil or olive oil mayonnaise. Tastes much better.

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